Saturday, August 12, 2017

Back to School 2017

Summer vacation is ending around the country.  It's a difficult, emotional time.  Children are panicking that their long vacation time is over.  Parents are experiencing a swell of unexpected feelings as well.

In a week (or a couple weeks, if your kids are in public school) your children will be gone all day, every day.  Your house will echo with emptiness.

Perhaps you're wondering how to fill this void in your life.  I have some suggestions:
  • Shout with joy
  • Throw a "first day of school party" for your friends
  • Call your school and suggest your kids have regular, after school detention
  • Laugh nonstop for 3-6 hours
  • Plan summer camps for 2018
  • Hide all your kids' favorite toys and leave ransom notes in their rooms
  • Eat all the desserts in the house
  • Send money to your local teachers' union
  • Contact colleges in other countries and ask about pre-paying tuition
  • Get drunk
  • Watch this video over and over again and laugh.

Saturday, August 5, 2017