Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Outrage Fatigue

I'm all out of outrage.

Outrage -- like oil, fresh water, and fresh, human blood -- is a precious, but limited resource.  There's only so much of it you can use before it stops flowing.  When you run out of oil, cars stop driving and the economy grinds to a halt.  When you run out of water, crops wither and die and people riot.  When you run out of blood, you have to give up your dreams of speaking to Nyarlathotep.
And I so wanted his autograph.

When you're out of outrage, though, you'll accept all kinds of horrors.  Americans have already accepted:
  • weekly mass shootings
  • the merging of church and state
  • the end of civility and public discourse
  • a poor job market
  • and the fact The Simpsons is still on the air.
Now we also have to accept daily (daily!) outrages from Trump:
  • publicly insulting anyone who disagrees with him
  • embarrassing the country before the world
  • destroying economic stability
  • obstructing justice
  • lying
  • and making bizarre statements.
Only a few months into his presidency, I've used up all the outrage I've delegated to this lifetime.  In my next life, when I've been reincarnated as a retired circus elephant's unicycle (I've been really bad), I might finally be able to be a tiny bit upset about something.

A taste of my future.
I'm trying to replenish my strategic outrage reserves, but it's hard in this media-saturated, sensationalism-focused world we live in.  If I want to tune out Trump, I have to avoid:
  • news
  • comedy shows
  • Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Grindr, GeoCities social media
  • conversations with friends
  • conversations with family
  • conversations with strangers
  • conversations with imaginary creatures
  • bumper stickers
  • going outside
  • and staying inside.

The only real way to avoid Trump is not to avoid him, but to focus on something else.  I've compiled a list of fulfilling things you can do to rest your outrage spouts for a little while.  My suggestions:
  • Go outside and breathe in the clean air.
  • Look into your finances.  How much do you invest abroad?  How quickly can you convert your assets into gold or something else with an intrinsic value?
  • Meditate.
  • Look into improving your home.  Does it have a fence?  A storm cellar?  Steel-reinforced doors?  How much freeze-dried food and sterile water can it hold?  How much would it cost to build a bomb shelter?
  • Go for a run.
  • Paint a picture of your neighborhood.  Now paint a picture of what it will look like in eight years.  Will there be any minorities or just white people with guns?
  • Take a class at your local park service or community college.
  • Plan a vacation to a foreign country.  Study their culture, government, language, and immigration policies.  Figure out how long they'd let you stay.
  • Bake a cake.
  • Teach your children how to play an instrument.  Teach your children a foreign language.  Teach your children how to put on a flak jacket and gas mask.
  • Call a friend.  While you still can.
Feel better?  Great!  Now hold on to that feeling, and check Twitter.

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