Thursday, August 14, 2014

RIP Nexus 4

My phone died over the weekend.  It was killed by a Motorola car charger that didn't like it very much.  Now phoneless, I feel sympathy for Sauron from Lord of the Rings, who put all his powers into a small item that destroyed him when it was destroyed.

(Sauron and I have a lot in common, btw. We both went to Carnegie Mellon University, we both dated women who turned into monsters, we both think Orcs are cool, etc.)

Anyway, in honor of my dear, departed Nexus 4, I post this compilation of pictures I took with it.  Sometimes, I snap pictures of things I find amusing, but never get around to making full blog posts out of them.  Here's what I took:
I found this model at the local Michael's. "Hey, kids!  You want to look cool like detectives Crockett and Tubbs?" I guess Hobby Lobby isn't the only craft store that's out of touch with modern culture.  

This herbal remedy is supposed to help with your heart, but (from the name) I'm guessing they're trying to compete with Viagra.

Evidence that Trader Joe's is a front for a crystal meth operation.

My son made this tank out of items in our kitchen.  On the one hand, I admire his ingenuity.  On the other, I had to demolish it to make dinner.

Seems like an ad for people with ADD.  "You should really save energy POPCORN because the environment POPCORN needs your help."

I took this picture on the school playground.  Someone's note/napkin fell out of his or her lunchbox, probably while the kid was running.

Someone was selling magic, protective amulets.  Apparently, Judaism protects you from earthquakes.

Someone's bumper sticker against the NSA.  Thing is, if you use an old-style, rotary phone like shown in this picture, the NSA is probably ignoring you.  If not, this sticker will totally make them back off.

Underside of my Revere Ware pot.  The copper discolored in a cool way.  Once, I accidentally left a similar pot on the stove for hours and found the whole thing glowing these colors.  Then the ceramic cooktop of the stove cracked in half.

A water bottle from my son's school we put in the bottom rack of the dishwasher.  Actually, it's a good representation of how I feel about our recent agreement with the school district.

This tiny tree had grown one, GIANT lemon.  I see it as a metaphor for something in life.  Parenthood?  Unbalanced lifestyle?  Bad eating habits?  You be the judge.

The rubber thing on the left is an eraser shaped like a robot I had since I was a kid (named BRAK).  I noticed his face is eerily similar to the Telltale Games logo.  My lawyer tells me this means Telltale owes me money for copyright infringement.  Who am I to argue with a litigious old man in a Dodge Rambler?

My art installation: racism as told through the medium of biscuits.

Went to go see Edge of Tomorrow starring Tom Cruise.  The sign above the theater said "Edge of Tom," which was a very accurate review of the film.

Found this in the candy aisle of Office Depot.  That's right, if you want candy, they'll send some guy over to your house with it.  I think we could quickly bankrupt the store with this policy.

Goodbye, old phone.  I shall miss you.  Well, until my new one arrives and I get text messages again.  Sheesh, where do they go, anyway?  Is that YOU stealing them, NSA?!

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