Thursday, March 20, 2014

GDC 2014 Booth Babes

I was planning on writing, as I do each year, about my amazing experiences at the Game Developer's Conference.  I was going to talk about the celebrities who came up to me to talk about my work, the expensive free gifts (A gold brick?  Seriously?  Uh, okay.) we all got, and the multimillion dollar business arrangements I made with captains of industry.

But, let's face it, you just want to hear about the booth babes.

Ladies, can't you see how uncomfortable you're making me?
For the uninitiated, "booth babes" is the term for spokesmodels who wear costumes and work the show floor.  I've always had a problem with GDC's spokesmodels because they won't keep their hands off me.

You can tell the blonde is hitting on me because she said "Don't come near me."
Ladies, I understand it's hard.  You see a hunky game-developer guy and think "I will not stop until he's mine," but show some restraint.  I'm not just some piece of meat.  I'm a person.  An incredibly handsome, brilliant, funny person with washboard abs.  Still, a person.

This hot number kept asking me to hold her hand(le) and talk about "rockets."
Perhaps next year I won't wear deodorant so they'll keep away.  Oh, no, wait, I did that this year.

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