Thursday, September 27, 2012

Never Take Me to a Store

If you have a highly-evolved mind like mine, you'll have trouble dealing with the sloppy idiocy of the common person.  For example, you would rage at the following magazine cover:
Oh, how horrible!
No, it's not that, after over a decade, we're still obsessed with a dead ex-princess too stupid to wear a seatbelt during a high-speed chase.  It's the obvious:
Yes, it's the fact that we can't use punctuation properly.  Punctuation and grammar are the only things that separate us from, well, this guy:

Thank you, Crazy Chinatown Guy.
You know what else bothers us hyper-intelligent people?  Cereal boxes:

When did advertising characters become so scary?  Looking at them in the store, I was afraid to take them home and leave them unsupervised with my children.

Finally, I am sick and tired of Pixar merchandising.  I can live with the "Cars" pez dispenser, the "Toy Story" fruit roll-ups, and the "Brave" maxi-pads.

But the "Eve from Wall-E" as a dressed as a mummy for Halloween? That's going too far.

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