Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Bad Superhero Marketing Ideas

As I have posted before, Spider-Man doesn't drive a car, or ride a motorcycle, or own an ATV.
The existence of the Spider-Man Vespa (which I thought I just made up, but was quickly disappointed) is entirely the result of marketing people smoking medical marijuana.  Normally, I'd expect that their doctors would cut them off after seeing the Spider-Man unicycle (which I just made... Oh, crap, that one's taken too?), but it seems I was wrong.  They've been at the Roman Red again.

Note this Batman toy I saw a little while ago.
"I am vengeance!  I am the night!  I am... wearing Robin's utility belt."
Or these shoes that caught my eye (because of their hideous shade of metallic green).  I couldn't figure out what they were supposed to be for the longest time, then I noticed the face.

Hulk no like laces!  Only Velcro!
Yes, it's a shoe with the Hulk's arms and the upper half of his head.  Seriously, it just has the top half of his head; I looked underneath the Velcro straps.  There's nothign there.

I like to imagine parents buying these shoes for their kid as a surprise, and he wakes to see them sitting outside the door to his room.
And he never leaves his room again as long as he lives.
And while we're on the subject of stupid marketing ideas, who came up with this alcohol name?  My guess is some guy who had a crappy HMO.
Don't put it on a wine label.  Just go see a doctor.

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