I was not an attractive youth. I was thin and gangly with a bad haircut and coke-bottle glasses. Then, one day, I hit puberty. BAM! Instant sexpot. What happened? Back hair happened.
|My yearbook photo.|
With my new majestic pelt I started dating with abandon (fifteen years later). Then I realized how unfair I was being to other men (and lesbians) with meager back hair (or no back hair at all!). I started wearing shirts, which was sad, but got me better service at restaurants. Whenever I’d go swimming, however, I’d still be swamped with women.
|You know you love it, ladies!|
|Because back hair means warm love.|
|The delivery system wasn't great, either.|
Sorry, but purposely bad spelling destroys “cool.”
|Kinda meta, don’t you think?|