|The name’s Frank. Frank Assessment.|
- Get sick.
Sometimes at the same time.
Okay, yeah, there are a lot of little things you do on a cruise, like hang over the edge of your verandah looking at the ocean while you eat and puke, but I’ll cover those tomorrow. Today, let’s just cover the two biggies.
Getting SickGetting sick on a cruise is inevitable, but not for the reason you might think. Nobody gets seasick on a modern cruise, because the ships are too big to move in the waves. It rocks a bit when the ship moves fast, but that feels like a 4.0 earthquake. For all of my readers who aren’t from California and haven’t experienced an earthquake, it feels like when the cops shake your home to wake you up and move it to another parking lot.
Most of the people who get sick on a cruise are sick from viruses. While you see
(excuse me, castmembers) constantly handing out disinfecting wipes and wiping
down railings, it’s inevitable that someone will bring the Norovirus onboard
and it will spread like… Well, it will
spread like the Norovirus in an enclosed space.
|Consider buying vacation insurance.|
One of the major problems on being on a big ship with nothing to do is that you’re on a big ship with nothing to do. To counteract that problem, each Disney vessel is equipped with six restaurants. No, I’m not making that up. Six restaurants:
- The always-open buffet.
- The disappointing-looking green restaurant.
- The princess-ey restaurant that girls love and boys hate.
- The over-the top restaurant with interactive cartoons that kids love and parents hate.
- The adults-only restaurant, that kids hate and parents love.
- The other adults-only restaurant, so you can hide from your kids after they find out you’re abandoning them again.