Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Up the Creek


I get obsessed with things I haven’t had closure with.  Sure, we all wonder about old girlfriends, failed college degrees, and that last brother from that family you swore to kill.  Me, I obsess over things I never finished.

I still wonder about Gilgamesh II, a short comic book miniseries I read a few pages of in the 80s (I finally found it online and downloaded it, but it turns out to be in Spanish).  In the 90s I saw a hilarious television show called Grapevine, and I’m still trying to find the few episodes I didn’t see.
Yeah, I need closure with her, too.  If you know what I mean.
Then there’s “Up the Creek.”  “Up the Creek” is a movie I saw the beginning of once, while working out at a 24-Hour Fitness.  The part I saw was about a loser college student who can’t sleep because a crow wakes him up early every morning.  He tries shooting it with a bow and arrow, firing a bazooka at it, and so on, but nothing kills it.  Later, he throws something casually off to his side, and you hear a squawk of the crow being killed.

Well, I assume the crow is dying.  Maybe it shows up again later.  See, the movie was so bad, I really don’t have the energy to track it down and write a complete DBIM entry like I normally do.  Besides, I have to find the hypertext story “In Large and Small Pieces,” because I read half of it once, twenty years ago.

(Oh, wait, there it is!)

So, if any of you know what happens to the crow, drop me a line.  Otherwise:

Severity: 2?
Genre: Movie
Date: 1984
Description: The main character is woken every day by a crow and tries to kill it with an increasingly impressive set of weapons. When he finally gives up, he absentmindedly throws something in its direction and you hear it scream as it's killed.
Mitigating Factors: Might not have died.
Aggravating Factors: Played for laughs.

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